Let them be kids

These past two years have not at all looked like what I had envisioned when I quit my job to stay at home with my children.  Growing up in public schools and being a public school teacher for five years, I, like most other parents, imagined spending our days together learning and crafting and learning some more.  I thought I needed a plan for teaching Izzy how to read and add and subtract at the age of 4.  I thought I needed to spend time teaching Addy, at the age of 2, her letters and numbers and how to count - you know, the important stuff :)

But God knows best, as long as we listen to His still, small voice.  These past two years I have had to babysit in order to supplement our income.  And, well, having an extra two or three kids that are not my own at our house each day changes things.  I have not been able to do what I had originally set out to do.  It just wasn't feasible.  The other kids were younger, not interested in learning and quite frankly, neither were my own kids.  They just wanted to play.  They just wanted to be kids.

They spent a chunk of the afternoon in the backyard pretending that there was a storm and a tornado coming.

It took me awhile, but I finally let go of trying too hard.  I finally let go of what I thought others would think because I wasn't "teaching" my children.  (Even though I really am teaching my children; I'm just not focusing on all the academic stuff.)

They love their sandbox and have been pretending to be sand castle salesgirls.

I finally realized that children need to be children.  They need time to grow and mature and get ready for all that formal academic stuff.  I finally realized...what's the rush anyway?  Why do we insist that our 3 year olds be able to count to 100 and know all their letter sounds?  If they don't learn those things until they are 6, do we consider them behind?  What's the big deal?  Do we not have faith that our kids will learn what they need to learn when they need to learn it?

C.S. Lewis in his book Mere Christianity wrote:

"Very often the only way to get a quality in reality is to start behaving as if you had it already.  That is why children's games are so important.  They are always pretending to be grown-ups - playing soldiers, playing shop.  But all the time, they are hardening their mucles and sharpening their wits so that the pretence of being grown-up helps them to grow up in earnest." (Book 4, Chapter 7)

It's so important to give our children time to be children - to play, pretend, build sandcastles, climb trees, and all that other stuff kids do.

They were pretending to be the mom (Addy) and grandma (Izzy) and that tree with the big hole in it was their house.

Another great quote, this time from educator Charlotte Mason who understood the value of play.

"Boys and girls must have time to invent episodes, carry on adventures, live heroic lives, lay sieges and carry forts, even if the fortress be an old armchair; and in these affairs the elders must neither meddle nor make.  They must be content to know that they do not understand, and, what is more, that they carry with them a chill breath of reality which sweeps away illusions...There is an idea afloat that children require to be taught to play - to play at being little fishes and lambs and butterflies.  No doubt they enjoy these games which are made for them, but there is a serious danger.  In this matter the child who goes too much on crutches never learns to walk; he who is most played with by his elders has little power of inventing plays for himself; and so he misses that education which comes to him when allowed to go his own way and act, 'As if his whole vocation were endless imitation.'"  (School Education, pg.37)

They really are learning.  They're growing in a way that maybe we can't see on the surface, but they are, and they're learning the most important things.

Let them be kids.

Linked up with: